I know I’m harping on this whole Snakes on a Plane thing, but Secondborn made a very valid point last night. All films should be named like this. You wouldn’t need a trailer or a synopsis. The title would tell it all and you could decide, just by looking at the names, what the movie was about, and whether or not you wanted to spend $14.50 and two hours of your life you’ll never get back, watching it.

So, I’ve been thinking up a few more movies that would benefit from “re-branding”:

• Rambo – Boy with Guns
• Seven – Brad Pitt
• Titanic – Big Ship with Icebergs
• Miami Vice – Two Boys with Guns
• Lord of the Rings – Midgets with Jewellery
• Legends of the Fall – Brad Pitt
• Hamlet – Boy’s Evil Uncle Kills Father and Marries Mother
• Lion King – Boy’s Evil Uncle Kills Father and Marries Mother
• The Sentinel – Old Action Heroes Trying Too Hard
• Star Wars – Boys with Shiny Swords in Space
• Star Wars Ep 1,2 & 3 - Boys with Too Much Money and their Own Production Company
  
• Apocalypse Now – Boys with Napalm
• Clueless – Girls with Credit Cards
• Indiana Jones: Boy with Tertiary Education and Guns
• The Magnificent Seven – Seven Boys with Guns
• ET – Boy with Alien
• Erin Brokovich – Tart with Law Books
• Oceans Eleven – Eleven Boys with Excellent Dental Work (or Brad Pitt – either works for me)
• V for Vendetta – Alliteration with Explosions
• Dukes of Hazzard – Boys with Cars
• Fight Club – Brad Pitt
• Charlie’s Angels – Girls with Guns
• Pirates of the Caribbean – Boys with Eyeliner
• Poseidon – Big Ship Tips Over
• Mr and Mrs Smith – Beautiful People with Guns (or Brad Pitt)

I’m on a roll here…I mean Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? Please! How about: Boy forgets Girl on Purpose?

Not at as poetic, I’ll admit, but hey, it does the job.